Another Memorable Adventure

I'm home from UIL OAP in Austin.  You don't know what that is?  Well...it's University Interscholastic League One Act Play competition.  (I certainly hope that I, Miss Smarty Pants, got all that right!)

For anyone out there who might have been able to miss hearing the details of this event from me, here they are.  For the second year in a row Martin High School has advanced to the state finals with their one act play.  Both years Madeline has had a leading role.  Both years the groupie grannies (Shirley and I) have traveled to Austin to share in the excitement.  It was especially exciting to us that we had "fan" shirts this year.  Here I am waiting outside Bass Hall on the University of Texas campus:

All of us thought they would win last year.  They didn't.  This year we all KNEW they were going to win.  Each and every member of the cast was spot on perfect.  Best performance EVER.  I wasn't even nervous because they were hands down so much better than the other 7 schools.

They were the lst runners up.  I don't know what to say,  except that the majority of the audience appeared to agree with me.  They got probably 10 times more audience response than any other play.  The place seemed mesmerized for 40 minutes as our kids enacted a script that was heavy, emotional, physically demanding, complicated (but clear), and sometimes very funny.  They received tremendous laughs, and one huge "Ohhhh," when it was announced that "Little Charles is Ivy's brother, not her first cousin."  (You would just have to have been there!)

Now this event lasts for HOURS.  The first play started at 4:00, and there were eight!  Each lasts 40 minutes--not one second over or it is disqualified. Then there's the presentation of awards, with many behind-the-scenes categories presented first.  There are signs up which say "No food or drink allowed in auditorium," but of necessity we packed pounds of snacks in our bags!  On the walk from the parking garage to the auditorium, Susannah insisted that Nanny and I give her our bags to carry.  Actually at the time I was grousing about mine and wishing I had brought wheels for it (the biggest one), cause it weighed A LOT.  Hers, the one on her right shoulder, had 3 bottles of water in it!  She's in her matching shirt but has her jacket and Nanny's over her shoulders.  So here she is, our little pack mule:

Madeline (Barbara) won a place in the All Star cast (one of 8), as did  Taylor Whitworth (Violet.)  Courtney Balke (Mattie Fae) won a place in the honorable mention All Star cast.  I'm giving you their names because their play, August Osage County, is being released in movie form.  Julia Robers will be Barbara, and Meryl Streep will be Violet. 

We got to stay at Hardin House, where Madeline is going to live.  A portion of the rooms are converted into "bed and breakfast" type accommodations in the summer.  It was lovely.  We even had eggs benedict for breakfast this morning.  Hardin House is Madeline's kind of place.  She loves vintage everything.  This place is vintage.  It was built in the same year I was born!

It is also Madeline's parents' type of place.  The sign is hard to read, but it says, "No male visitors

beyond this point!" 

Shirley and I got to tag along with Rob, Susan, and Susannah.  It was so nice not to have to drive and park.  From my comfy back seat I pulled out my sunglasses this morning and put them on.  Imagine my surprise at the view they provided:

Yes, a lid to my water bottle from yesterday was stuck in one lens.  Couldn't have done that on purpose for a million dollars.

Off to get ready for the senior awards program.  I may have an empty nest, but I still have a full schedule!  And I love it! 

I've been thinking...

My life now is very different from the majority of my years spent as a mother and wife.  Something about it impresses me every morning--the sameness of routine. 

I groggily get up, make my way to the kitchen with Charleigh-Girl close behind, get a bottle of water and start drinking it, get her bowl, measure out her food, try to get it on the floor before she knocks it out of my hand, turn off the outside lights and the alarm, turn on the coffee maker, and let C-G outside.  Every morning.  Exactly the same.  I'm not only on a fixed income, I'm on a fixed routine.

What impresses me about this is that it lets me know how quickly the remainder of my life on this earth is passing by.  I no more than turn around and I'm performing that routine again.  Only a weirdo like me would figure something like this out, but...if my life were a clock, and if I were to live 100 years, it's 45 minutes past the hour!  Or, if it were a football game, I'm in the last quarter!

There are sooo many great things about this stage in my life.  I am blessed with health.  I am blessed with freedom.  I am blessed with the most wonderful of families.  I am physically responsible only for myself and my canine companion.  Actually, I am blessed in about one million ways.  But...the greatest blessing of all is this:

         "When I've been there ten thousand years, bright shining as the sun... 
          I've no less days to sing God's praise...than when I first begun."

Yes, I'm not really in the last quarter hour or the last quarter of the game.  I'm living a life which will never end.  I have a mansion in glory.  And what did I do to deserve this?  Absolutely nothing. I placed my trust and my life in the hands of Jesus who died that I might be forgiven my sins and live forever in the presence of God.  I am blessed most by amazing grace--God's unmerited favor.

Another April 10th

Before Jack passed away, I was an expert on grieving--at least my own.  I told everyone that I had had ten years to prepare.  I very genuinely appreciated all the beautiful cards and words of comfort I received, but I turned down any offers of support groups or anything of the sort because I was going to be fine.  It's been two years today, and I think I'm still not exactly fine.

If you're on Facebook you may have seen Susan's beautiful post yesterday--a rather bad day for me.  I really clung to the precious encouragement she gave me, as well as to the responses of so many treasured friends.

 I remembered this morning that I am doing better this year than last.  I didn't go to sleep last year until after 2:00 A.M., the time he breathed his last breath.  I still was surprised that this feeling of sadness has been creeping up on me for several days.  Actually, I had listened to a song on my iPod a while back and foolishly thought I would be able to post it as applying to me on this anniversary:

Sometimes a day goes by, one whole entire day, when I don't think of him
Twenty four hours pass, I look around and find...that I haven't thought of him
Not even when I'm somewhere we used to go, not even if there's someone we used to know
It's hardly every day, it's most unusual, in fact, I can't remember when, but
Sometimes a day goes by that I don't think of him, til morning comes and then...
There he is again.

Forgetting Jack for a whole day?  This is not happening, oh grief expert that I am!  I can't believe I ever thought it would.  We were together every day for 52 years.  He was and is an integral part of everything that is important to me!   The good memories surround me.  I think of him many times every day.

I read a great book this year called Major Pettigrew's Last Stand.  The major was a widower, and I underlined something said about his grief which impressed me.  "It surprised him that his grief was sharper than in the past few days.  He had forgotten that grief does not decline in a straight line or along a slow curve like a graph in a child's math book."   I think that sort of decline is exactly what I was expecting.

 God just placed a scripture in my mind as I was writing this.  It is Proverbs 3:5-6.  "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.   In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your path." 

Charleigh-Girl's Trip to the Salon!

Friday is always hair-do day for me.  Today it was for Charleigh-Girl too.  She went to The Pines Pet Pampering to get beautified.  Now the Pines is miles away in Joshua, but her highness must have the best.
 
She very willingly went in the front door, but once she realized I was not staying, she changed her mind.  Here she is, however, looking pretty content in her "waiting room."  (All photos were graciously taken by the groomers.)

Now here she is being de-shedded.  As you can imagine, Charleigh-Girl sheds profusely!

As she gets situated for the bath, I can't tell what this look is.  A yawn?  One of her lopsided smiles?  Seriously, she smiles at me.  I have witnesses.  At any rate, she looks very relaxed!

Here she goes--rub-a-dub-dub!

I actually have this same pose of Maddie and Susie! 

And this one--in her Turbi-Twist!!  Isn't she adorable?

After blow-drying it was time to pick the girl up.  When I arrived, there was no one at the front desk.  I had to open the front door several times before the young man on duty heard the buzzer and knew I was there.  When I said the first word to him, Charleigh-Girl began barking from back in the recesses!  She couldn't see me but recognized my voice--from quite a distance.  So here she is in "her" car (Jack's Navigator) all clean and fluffy and ready to go home!

And here she is ready for Easter dinner!

This is where she headed when we got home.  From the time we got C-G I have insisted this be referred to as her "palace."  I've only recently realized that she actually likes it, even though various people and family members tried to convince me that she would. 

A day of beauty can be exhausting!

Untitled Hymn

It was Wednesday--choir rehearsal night--several weeks ago.  We got out music for the first time for an "Untitled Hymn."  The minute we started singing I got all excited! (Can you imagine?  Me...excited?!!)  I had placed this song on my iPod several years ago.  I still remember the first time I heard it.  I was at Grubbs Infiniti getting an oil change.  Grubbs is a Christian owned company which plays Christian music on their waiting room speakers.  The receptionist helped me figure out what it was.

I loved this song for the beauty of its melody and words.  However, when Jim Parks, our minister of music, asked what the song was really saying, I couldn't answer.  Jim walked us through the words very thoughtfully.  He showed us the progression of the verses with profound insight.

It begins with a person who does not know Jesus.
Weak and wounded sinner, lost and left to die; O, raise your head for love (Jesus) is passin' by.
Come to Jesus, come to Jesus, come to Jesus and live!

Then that person meets and embraces Jesus.
Now your burden's lifted and carried far away, and precious blood has washed away the stain.
So sing to Jesus, sing to Jesus, sing to Jesus and live!

That person then begins a walk with Jesus, not being afraid to start as a child, with small steps. 
Like a newborn baby, don't be afraid to crawl.  And remember when you walk sometimes you fall.
So fall on Jesus, fall on Jesus, fall on Jesus and live!

I can particularly identify with this verse, as can many of you--a time of troubles.
Sometimes the way is lonely, and steep and filled with pain, so if your sky is dark and pours the rain,
Then cry to Jesus, cry to Jesus, cry to Jesus and live!

And right now praise the Lord, I can heartily identify with this--immeasurable joy!
And when the love spills over, and music fills the night, and when you can't contain your joy inside,
Then dance for Jesus, dance for Jesus, dance for Jesus and live!  


Because of this verse, I may have to add this to the songs I wish to be sung at my funeral.
And with your final heartbeat, kiss the world goodbye, then go in peace and laugh on Glory's side.
And fly to Jesus, fly to Jesus, fly to Jesus and live! 

Now that I understand this song as the story of a weak and wounded sinner who comes to Jesus, lives for Jesus, and will live eternally with Jesus, I love it even more--if that is possible!  Come to Fielder Church this Sunday morning and hear me and almost a hundred others sing this with all our hearts and souls.  I will be feeling like I'm flying straight to Jesus!  Services are at 9:30 and 11:00.

By the way--it is listed on my iPod as "Untitled Hymn," but I think it can be found as "Come to Jesus" by Chris Rice on iTunes. 





    

Sisters

I have heard it said that the ideal family consists of father, mother, two daughters, and two sons, so that each child may experience having a brother and a sister.  Personally, I felt we had the ideal family when we had one daughter and one son!  I did not have a sister.  My daughter did not have a sister.  Even my daughter-in-love does not have a sister.  I did not realize the importance of a girl having a sister, until...

Susannah Logan Metzger was born on November 28, 1995.  Madeline Jane Metzger, born on October 6, 1993, now had a sister!  Wow!

Watching these two through the years has been amazing.  They are best friends even though competitors at times.  They share many of the same strengths, yet have some all their own.   

Admittedly there are times when the glories of having a sister have to be sought out.  There were those "Make her quit looking at me moments."  Maddie can arch one eyebrow (a la Scarlett O'Hara) when Susannah appears on the scene wearing her (Mad's) clothes head to toe!  Other times Maddie dresses Susannah in her clothes (and keeps track, I'm sure,  for future payback.)  Susannah will tell you right quick that the situation happens in reverse often, too.  Their wardrobes will be virtually cut in half when Maddie leaves for Austin in the fall.

I honestly did not realize how hard it was going to hit Susannah for Maddie to go away to college.  Here is a post she put on Facebook last month, right after Maddie made a decision to attend UT, evoking buckets of tears in our family.

Susannah's caption reads, "I'm gonna miss you so much next year."  (And a sad face with a tear.)  Madeline's reply, "Aw, Susannah, why do you do this to me,  I love you so much."  (With frowny face and hearts!)  The picture in the center is of the two of them singing at a fund raiser at The Grease Monkey.  Singing and acting are talents they definitely share.  The picture above and to the right is of them in costume for last year's musical, Sweeney Todd. The one I love the most is in the bottom left corner.  It is Madeline fixing Susannah's hair for a special occasion.  She also does her makeup--both beautifully.  The one of them holding the orange sign (which says "Oh, Susannah) is after Susannah competed in Martin Idol.  Madeline and her friends were a boisterous cheering section for Susie.  (She told me it was pretty great having a senior sister!)

The senior show choir members had Pops Night recently. I want you to see Susie's ad in the program for Maddie.

 Again, I'm going to have to interpret this, as I had to just photograph it.  At the top it says, "SISTERS...SISTERS  there were never such devoted sisters!  Sharing, caring, every little thing we are wearing...'Thanks for being my adviser, comforter, hairdresser, makeup artist, and best friend!  Not sure what I'm gonna do without you next year.  Love you :) - Susie"   So precious and so true.

What I also LOVE is a line from the song which is over to the left of the center picture.  "Lord help the sister who comes between me and my mister!!!"  That picture was taken on Martin Idol night when  Susannah just happened to be standing between Maddie and "her man," Thomas!!!  Couldn't have planned it better!!!

This life has held so many blessings for me that were unexpected.  Getting to experience the marvelous bonds of sisterhood through these two special creatures is one of the best.  This verse again expresses my feelings (and those of Susan and Rob in their ad for Madeline.)  "Now to Him who by the power at work within us is able to do far more abundantly than all we ask or think, to Him be glory...in Christ Jesus for ever and ever."  Ephesians 3:20-21

Basking in Memories

It all started with this....

I have collected coffee mugs from our travels through the years. I'm sooo glad that was my souvenir of choice!  This one that I selected for my coffee this morning says "Coral Princess Inaugural Season."  I couldn't remember which cruise it was, so I turned here...

and here...

Now this is almost embarrassingly over the top O.C.D., but I promise it's my only extreme behavior!  I have 33 of those photo albums, one or sometimes two from each cruise Jack and I took together, and some from our land trips.  The first thing I did when we got home was get to work on the trip album!  The folders contain memorabilia from the trip, including all daily schedules.  Therefore...I can reminisce with great detail, and that's what I've been doing this morning.

This trip on the Coral Princess in 2003 was primarily a Panama Canal cruise.  It was not only new, it was a beauty of a ship.  I called it "the ship with blue eyes."

Looking back this morning, there are a couple of things about this cruise that make it particularly memorable in hindsight.  We always requested a "table for two by the windows," even before Jack was diagnosed with Alzheimer's.  Here we are.  It would seem we got our wish.

However, there is a drawback to this table for two.  See the glasses in the right hand corner?  Well...that's the corner of another table for two which is very close to ours, making this virtually a table for four!  See?

Although this is just September of 2003, only about three years after Jack's diagnosis, he was already having enough memory problems that he could not remember a thing Frank and Josephine had told him the previous nights.  That gave me the job of attempting to cover for him, defeating the purpose of the table just for us!  Not a major problem--but a reminder to me this morning of the progression of the illness.

Another memorable event is surprising in the other direction.  We liked to take pictures of each other on our balcony when the ship was in a port.  Here is Jack's picture of me.

And here is my picture of him.

The amazing thing about this is that first, Jack was still able to go down to the pier and back to our stateroom by himself.  Second, you will notice that he zoomed in on me (this was actually his second shot.)  Not too many trips later he was unable to take my picture at all.

I must include this shot of us in Puntarenas, Costa Rica, with the beautiful Coral Princess in the background.  We had to tip a guy in the shoreside market to take it for us!

Last, here is a picture of my "pack mule," I lovingly called him.  This was a two week cruise, and we were the best dressed people on the ship!  (Or if we weren't, we certainly should have been!)  Don't you know Jack would have been relieved when the airlines began limiting checked bags?!  But he was always good natured about my excess baggage!

Oh, my!  What wonderful memories.  Thank you, Lord, for enabling us to see the world together.